When someone compliments your skin, do you say thank you or do you feel the need to point out a flaw you see?
If you’re anything like me, rejecting a compliment had become a reflex. No matter how genuine the compliment may be, I would struggle to just be grateful and say thank you! This stemmed from a lack of self confidence and little (to no) self love.
Growing up I never felt confident in my complexion.
I suffered with severe, inflamed acne and was so desperate to heal that I decided to build my career helping those who struggle with their skin as well. When you’re struggling with problematic skin concerns it is easy to want to crawl away and hide. On my acne healing journey I was often left feeling in pain- both physically and emotionally. Over the years I have been able to shed the heaviness of acne trauma that weighed me down and have found empowerment in owning each chapter of my skin healing journey through the highs and lows.
I was that girl that wore a full face of makeup to bed at sleepovers, because I didn’t love my natural reflection in the mirror. I was that girl that would cry in distress if my acne was severely flared up and makeup couldn’t hide it. I was the girl that didn’t draw attention to myself, because I just wanted to hide. That version of myself was sad and lonely. Don’t fret though, I have sat with her and forgave her. Now it’s your turn! Are you ready?
I am able to feel so much love and confidence for the skin I’m currently in due to learning from my growing pains. It is my gift to you, to share some guidance on things that helped me dig deeper and grow.
I’m here to let you in on a little secret…
…the code to feeling confident in your skin, is to take the bold step forward into your self love journey. The magic won’t happen overnight and it will be a forever work in progress.
I have some good news though, you woke up today. You were gifted another day in life and I’m so happy you’re here. I know that deep down, you’re ready to enter your confident, self love era.
You’re sick of hiding, second guessing yourself and feeling embarrassed of the skin you’re in.
Take a deep breath. Give yourself permission to forgive, be patient and heal.
Forgive your skin for all it has been through. Maybe you’ve struggled with acne? Rosacea? Scarring? Eczema? Stretch Marks? Wrinkles? Sun damage? These skincare concerns are nearly a symptom of a season you’ve been through (or are going through). When working with my clients, we work together to find what triggers in their lives are inflaming their skin. Through each step, it’s important to forgive your past and current self.
Self affirm with me:
My skincare concerns don’t make me less than.
My skincare concerns don’t take away from my beauty.
My skincare concerns don’t define me.
Sit in that truth.
For my plant lovers out there, have you heard that when you talk sweet to your plants they will listen, grow and thrive? Our bodies and minds are the same. Take the time to talk sweet to yourself. I know in my heart and soul that you are one of a kind and your impurities don’t take away from the light that you are. With some practice, you will start to believe in yourself too.
Alright, time to get a little corny (which is very on brand for me)…
Patience is a virtue. Why is that?
Patience, the ability to wait, is a superpower. Most of us lose our patience right before a big breakthrough. When you enter your self love journey, no matter what stage, patience will carry you every step of the way.
When you’re working to self accept each version of you, don’t lose patience.
Imagine if caterpillars lost patience and gave up on their journey to become butterflies?
Yes, we would have an earth full of fuzzy little friends crawling around and that would be rad.
You know what’s breathtaking? A sky full of butterflies.
They took their time to become their best version of themselves.
They trusted the process and were patient.
Like a beautiful butterfly you are gently preparing for your hard launch into your bad bitch era.
You are being patient with yourself as you enter and exit new chapters of your skin healing journey.
You are being patient that good things take time, education and some work.
You are being patient in understanding you will have good days and bad days; that’s okay!
Acne or not, you deserve to take up space.
You deserve to feel beautiful in the skin you’re in!
Our self love journey’s won’t be linear, because healing never is.
Healing your mind, body & soul all ties into how we view ourselves and guess what…
That impacts our journey to feeling confident in our skin.
You will have days that you feel like a million bucks (for my friends who geek out on hormone health- I’m talking about our ovulatory phase)!
You will have days you want to run and hide (hiiii luteal phase).
Give yourself permission to feel your feels and heal.
A tool that has helped me immensely on my healing journey is journaling.
If you’re old school like me, a pen and paper does the job. If that’s not your jam, some of my clients thrive on leaving themselves voice memos to listen back on. That’s the beauty of journaling, there’s no wrong way to do it.
Take the time to brain dump all your feelings. Writing insecurities out helped me bridge the gap between fears and truth. I realized that making myself small out of fear of judgment didn’t make people notice me any less. With time, I was able to realize through journaling that these deep rooted insecurities were reflections I made of myself and not insecurities that others placed on me.
I can’t wait for you to feel the freedom for yourself. That “aha” moment when you put the pieces together. After you trauma dump and come to realize you deserve to take up ALL the space, come find me. I want to hear you proudly revel in your wins. This is only the beginning!
Next time you find your mind wandering to self doubt, you’re going to switch it up.
First, you are going to validate your feelings and forgive yourself.
Second, you are going to be patient with the process. As we discussed, it’s a work in progress. That’s okay! You have time!
Most importantly, you are going to heal! You are going to proudly take up space and feel confident in the skin you’re in.
Together, we are going to break the cycle.
Like a beautiful butterfly you are going to embrace change. You’re ready to open those magical wings and fly!
One more time, let’s self affirm:
I am allowed to take up space.
I am beautiful inside and out.
I am forgiving, being patient and healing myself.
Sit in that TRUTH!
I am here, by your side, each step of the way.
Forever rooting for you.
Jill Decoteau is passionate about all things holistic healing- especially skin! Her journey to holistic esthetics was inspired by her own acne journey. After years of suffering, she decided to take matters into her own hands! She believes our skin is a mirror to our internal health and in healing problematic skin concerns holistically. In her free time you can find her playing outside, having fun in the kitchen and spending time with her sweet thang, Cory. Jill lights up when talking about skincare, women’s hormone health and all things wellness!